This Past Weekend (was such a bummer)

This past weekend was pretty lame and I'll tell you why: because I had to grade essays.

I dislike grading essays and I'm a talented procrastinator so I always end up having to do about ten of them in one night and it's absolutely torturous. Actually, it's not that bad. Sometimes it's okay. Plus I like taking breaks in between papers to play Playstation. That's why it takes me so long to go over the papers. Also, I constantly worry that I'm going to hurt some student's feelings because I've told them they don't have a discernible thesis. This paragraph is not cohesive . . . that's what I would tell myself if myself was a student. But I'm a teacher and so I can do whatever I want. I like that part.

I'm going to go snowboarding by myself I think, because no one here snowboards and I really, really want to go. I'm kind of excited because I'm going to be all grown-up and brave.

Ughhhhh. It's late and I'm supposed to be getting things ready for teaching tomorrow. But I'm not. And I'm not going to! I'm going to wing it. Sometimes that doesn't work at all, but I have a "feeling." This feeling tells me that I don't care if winging it doesn't work.

P.S. I bought Mortal Kombat for my Playstation 2, because all of the PS2 games are really cheap now, but anyway, did you know that you can make your own fighter!? It is so neat! You can pick the hairstyle and eye color and all kinds of outfits!! I love it! I'm shouting in my head, that's how much I love it!
P.P.S. I'm also watching The Goonies right now. Does anybody remember that movie? Because it's so great.

Ohio = Worst State Ever

I'm in Ohio.

I'm in Ohio and also I can't sleep. It's because I just drove here from home and it's seven hours from there to here and I drink a substantial amount of coffee to help me stay awake. That's why I'm not sleeping. I'm not even making an attempt at sleep. Instead I'm doing this and eating popcorn.

A car just drove by and it was so loud. The cars here are loud because this is hill country and the hill country people drive their effing loud cars just as often as they wear trucker hats to Wal-Mart. Which is every second.

Really I'm just mad and that's why I said those mean things. This is hill country, but the hill country people are just like you and me except dirtier.

Ha! That was another joke. And it was mean. I won't do that again. It's just because of the cars. Really I think it's just one car and some jerk drives it past my house every night at 1:00 AM. One time though I woke up at 3:33 because somebody was driving past my house in a travesty of noise and bother. It was so loud . . . I can't even explain how loud it was, and even if I could you probably wouldn't be able to comprehend the magnitude of it, just because it was and is beyond the ability and decency of normal human beings.

Also, I live on the third floor of my house and so you'd think the percussive quality of sound would decrease as it travels away and upwards . . . you'd think that and you'd be wrong because in Ohio sound defeats the principles of physics and all the other sciences and increases in volume as it expands and travels.

I'm finally feeling tired. It's because of all the big words which, by the way, I threw in without really considering their true definitions. And my investigation into the principles of sound is so totally made up. Whatever.